Funny Definitions of Some Day to Day Life Words

Chickens : The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead. Committee : A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours. Dictionary : A place where success comes before work. Divorce : Future tense of marriage. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills. Etc : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do. Handkerchief : Cold storage. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after. Refrigerator : Combination art gallery and air-conditioner for the kitchen. Secret : Something you tell to one person at a time. Vegetarian : Old Indian word for bad hunter. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early. Professor : Someone who talks in someone else’s sleep.

Shahrukh Khan's Gujarati Film Names - Funny Thought

What is Fine and Tax from the perspective of CA Student - Funny

TEACHER: WHAT IS FINE????

C.A. STUDENT: FINE IS A TAX FOR DOING WRONG.

TEACHER: WHAT IS TAX??????

C.A. STUDENT: A TAX IS A FINE FOR DOING RIGHT........

Hilarious Aarti of Google - in Hindi

Funny - Office Memo to All Employees

Office Memo:-
To: All Employees

Dear Staff,
It is advised that you come to work dressed according to your salary. If we see you wearing Prada sneakers and carrying a Gucci bag we assume that you are doing well financially and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes and therefore you do not need a raise. If you dress in-between, you are right where you need to be and therefore you do not need a raise.

Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year. They are called Saturday and Sunday.

Lunch Breaks:
Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch as they need to eat more so that they can look healthy. Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a balanced meal to maintain their average size. Fat people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's all the time needed to drink a Slim Fast and take a diet pill.

Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor statement as proof of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.

Restroom Use:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the restroom. There is now a strict 3 minute time limit in the stalls. At the end of 3 minutes, an alarm will sound, the toilet pater roll will retract, the stall door will open and a picture will be taken. After your second offense, your picture will be posted on the company bulletin board under the "Chronic Offender" category.

Surgery:
As long as you are employed here, you need all your organs. You should not consider removing anything. We hired you intact. To have something removed will constitute a breach of employment.

Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore, all questions, comments, concerns, complaints, frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations, allegations, accusations, contemplation, and input should be directed elsewhere.

Have a nice week.

Funny Animals Pics

Funny Animals